new project: jei & i.

STAC Live is vastly approaching, which means all preparation must be getting done.

My big thing in STAC was photography. I don't like how I use the term was, but it seems to be the best way to explain this. I have been lacking on my photography. I barely carry my camera around. And by barely, I mean that I never do. I don't even bring it to parties. It basically has a permanent spot on my shelf.

But I do have my iPhone. Strange enough, I haven't lost touch with photography. Right now, over the last three months, i have about 1,500 photos on my phone. I edit a bunch of them, just as if i took photos on my camera and edited them on my computer. My phone is more accessible and faster. Ergo, here's where my iPhone photography kicked in.

Luke noticed it, since I posted it on Facebook, and I've been getting positive feedback on it. I was looking forward to making commercials, but Luke decided to give me a different assignment: a slideshow for STAC Live. This is where Jei comes in. Jei has the ability to play instruments and make amazing music. But Jei never composed/wrote his own pieces. Here's the assignment: a slideshow with my iPhone photography and Jei's own music.

I'm pretty excited and hope all goes well. It's cool that I can have my pictures displayed and Jei's music played. Can't wait!

-ashleycoppolino

Stressed

I'm stressed. I seem to be on edge with everything I put my hands on. I take on way too much and I act like it's ok, but sometimes it's not.
Lately, my mind has been jumping out of control. I could be holding a conversation and be thinking about something else. I could be working on a project and be sorting out another one in my head. My concentration is totally off lately, so I apologize.
I don't even have the time to be writing this, because schoolwork has consumed my life.
I've been trying to deal with my conflicts as best as possible, but it seems as one problem begins to clear, another problem bursts. I know I take on too much, but being busy keeps me out of trouble, which is what I like an need.
I've looked back on my blogs and it looks like I've talked about stress before. Just like I said in the past: breathe.. In, out, in, out.

-ashleycoppolino

Senior Assignment: my take on it

I feel that it is necessary to blog about today.

This blog post is not meant to start conflict, but it is something I must post.

This assignment is my least favorite so far. It's obvious that I don't associate with my fellow seniors that much. Really, just Jon. Otherwise, I'm surrounded by STACies that are younger. I feel like I'm constantly put down and judged when I'm around the seniors, and that's not a feeling I need or want in my life. So I decided to exclude myself from it.

I have learned my limits, which I believe is something that STAC has taught me. I learned when I can't handle certain situations any longer, which is why I left the class today. I don't need to involve people in my personal drama, so I took it upon myself to quietly leave the class.

As some of you may know, I have major anxiety problems, which has worked against me in many ways. My heart was racing and my hands were shaking while listening to what people were saying, and I couldn't handle it. I know, you're not supposed to walk away when things get tough, but I know my limits, and if I stayed there, it would have gotten bad.

In my groups defense (Jon, Mile, Mairead), we had our plan for our presentation. This is longer-term assignment so we decided to take it further than improv, which seemed puzzling to the two other groups. We couldn't exactly explain our piece since we are incorporating music and film. We haven't written the script or chose the songs, so I can see how the other groups are confused by us. But don't shoot down our ideas and tell us that we wasted our time and that you realized things faster ergo we were falling behind. And as we were discussing today, somebody said, "I don't mean to offend you", which seemed like a fake act for the rest of STAC to me, because you knew I was offended already.

I am sincerely sorry to Jon, Mairead, & Mike because my reactions have negatively affected my group. I think what we did is brilliant and our ideas will turn put amazing. I will never put you down- it's very wrong. And I don't want to be put down. I don't want to be mocked in class. The senior girls sat on the computer looking at prom dresses as a serious problem was being addressed. So if you don't care, why should I. I am truly sorry to my group. But I don't think that I can handle this stress at this stage in my life.

And I don't want to get comments like, "this is life.", "this will happen in the future.", & "you have to get over it.". Because, truth is, I know what life is like. I'm living it. I've been in worse situations and experienced major conflicts in my life. My future will be stressful, as all of ours will be, but it will not be tolerated to be treated like this, I guarantee it. And I will get over it. Not today, not tomorrow, maybe not Monday either, but I will eventually.

When I came back into the room all red-faced and obvious that I shed some tears, it meant a lot to me that Danny, Scott, Mairead, Grace, Michelle, Caitlin, and others came right to me to hug me & tell me that they're there for me. That's the type of people I need in my life. They're the reason that I come to class everyday, aside from doing art. But they influence my art. They help shape me into the type of person I am and the abilities I have in STAC.

-ashleycoppolino

Oh, acting.

I think I've made it fairly obvious that I don't like acting. But I'm stepping out of my comfort zone and experimenting with new disciplines. I'm a senior now, so this seems to be the year to do everything before my time runs out.

This specific lesson was comfortable for me. I may have mentioned it before, but anger is my best emotion as far as acting goes, I believe. I'm not scared to yell at somebody if I have to. And yes, it's acting, we're not actually yelling or punching people, but God, does it feel real when you're told to punch Scott La Marca then your Grandma. Punching Scott is easy. It's too natural, actually. Sorry, Scott! But you know I'm joking (usually)! But when a random person, like your Grandma is called, and then imagined right in front of your very eyes, I got weak. I'm never weak. I don't like the feeling, which is probably why my anger is so strong.

It was a pretty bad day for me. My guidance councilor basically lost all hope in me which pretty much tore me apart for the day. Instead of handling it like a good human being would, I got angry. I took screaming at the community center out on her. I poked her, slapped her, punched her repeatedly, and didn't feel sorry. I don't know what this says about my actual character, but as far as acting goes, I think I'm getting better.

In conclusion, acting is annoying. It screws with your head. It makes me over analyze this intricate situation when meanwhile I'm standing on a worn-down stage with no one as an audience. Your mind is fooled by words that seep through your ears and into your mind, that carries on to your exterior self, creating an illusion that makes you put on quite the performance.

Oh, acting.

-ashleycoppolino

I hate acting with that hat.

i don't even know where to begin. i've been staring at this page aimlessly for over a half hour now.

that damn hat. it raised every hair on my body. all the power that i walked in the room with vanished the second my finger touched the hat. if it were really my brother's room and my brother's hat, i wouldn't have dared to touch it. The second I touched the hat it became real. I couldn't believe I took his hat

And then you realize you're acting. Then I became aware of my child-like posture and my increased heart-rate, which just make me sink inside.

I'm angry. This I know. But not everybody does. I spend most of my days, months, & years angry. I know why I am too. But I never thought I'd be posting this on a blog for the public to know. Ugh, I hate this feeling. I'm angry at myself, but mostly at my grandparents. They left me and I blame them for it everyday. It wasn't like they decided to leave me, they just passed away. Well, my Nana had the option of surgery or death, and well, she didn't choose the surgery. I blame her for not choosing to fight to be here. It kills me everyday. It's been on my mind since the day she died. And my other grandparents.. My Pop-Pop passed away with me on his lap, which has scared my whole life. God, the last words he ever said were, "I love you, my Angel", which tore me apart. His heart stopped beating. I never met my mom's mom but all my cousins say that I'd love her & she was the greatest grandma. And Mom's dad got to see all his grandchildren except me. He lost his sight right before I was born, & since I'm the last grandchild of the family, I'm the only one that he's never seen. Sometimes I think he saw me. It makes me feel better. Why am I crying. But yeah, that's the truth. This just makes me angry. It shouldn't, but what can I do, it's life.

I hate that damn hat.

I can't type anymore.

-ashleycoppolino

Oh, just readin' blogs, pickin' lines I like.

Well that was off topic, but I liked it. -Jessica

a blank wall in need of lovin'.

The blank wall was blank for too long.
I wanted to re-do the murial, mostly because I wanted to be on the wall and be recgonized.
We didn't do the murial, obviously, but I did make it on the wall and I am recgonizable.
Starting off with out names and branching out to what we love give a visual perspective of what we keep in our brains. In our minds, we know what we love, and why we love it, but without conciously thinknig about it, you wouldn't think about what you love and why you love it continuiously to form this web.
That's why I found this assignment intriguing. Turns out that I love music because it's memorable. But I actually love music because of the voice, and i love voice because it's honesty, and i love honesty because it's expression and then a couple of branches later, i end up at memorable.
In a weird way, it makes me think about if my brain was a museum and I was taking a tour. I don't know, it was just one of those activities.

-ashleycoppolino

STAC 2011-12

Hi!

I can't believe that I am blogging for my lsat year of STAC. It's absolutely unreal. Where has the time gone? Ugh, time.. Time is so misleading. Time convinces you that it's unlimited, yet we're a ticking bomb every day - time for class, time to eat, time to breathe, time to repeat. I know this year is going to fly by, and I want to capture it as much as possible.

I have no doubt in my mind that this year in STAC will be just as educational as the past. Yes STACies, we learn! Obviously, though, but it's not like learning how to prove a circle is a circle with a proof. By learning, I mean skills that will be used everyday for the rest of my life and enhancing out talent, a.k.a. luck, for 100% success in our future.

Enough chatting about what we already know, see you all tomorrow.

-ashleycoppolino

Anti-Bullying

Today was pretty significant. For those who wore the plain white tee, they'd agree with me. Having people graffiti you with hurtful words is a hard feeling. The ironic thing about this process is that people graffiti people everyday. Sure, they're not using Sharpies, but they're definitely labeling people with hurtful words and having each other walk around with this weight. The slogan, "put the weight of your words on me" worked perfectly. It described exactly what people needed to know.
The experience I had with a fellow classmate can't clearly be described. It was definitely eye-opening.
STAC is used to bullying, but instead of trying to help banish it or prove it wrong, we usually just would show off. It's interesting how positively this interaction with the rest of the school was so successful.

-ashleycoppolino

Sitting in STAC Periods 5 and 6.

Ever hear of The Beatles, Audrey Hepburn, Brook Shields or Andy Warhol? Anyone sound familliar?

They were all photographed by Richard Avedon!

He has this way of photographing which became popular in the world of advertisitng and straight portraits. You probably don't think of these photos as anything, but he was unique for shooting strictily on plain background. Here's The Beatles:

See? All plain bacgrounds. It probably reminds you of school picture day.. just sayin'.

And Diane Arbus.. She was a little bit crazy. She focused mainly on black and white square photographs. As Luke put it, "you wouldn't want her photographing your kids."

She took photos of people that are ugly or surreal. She was basically known as the "photographer of freaks". She photographed what people didn't want to see.. but that's what made her famous and in her own style.

I don't know her mindset, but she did commit suicide after doing this photography for years.

Both people that are different, and who were great friends in their time, developed their own sense of photography.. and if you see either of their photographs, you should be able to point out the work of the artist.

-ashleycoppolino

Writing Workshop (2)

This worshop consisted in bringing in your idea with a writing piece that begins the idea that you came up with. I thought I was doing good. I love my idea. I found mystery writing to be a mystery to me, so I experimented and thoguht about a story that has mainly nothing to do with me. It's a few teenage boys that live in Missouri and they travel to Lake Michigan and one dies. The story is told from the killer's POV, which you don't know, but I feel the need to explain that now. The constructive critisim helps because of hearing that it's good or bad, it's more or less saying why it works or doesn't. Mainly, I got that it doesn't work. I'm not upset or anything, but it was a bit of a let down to say the least. Mystery's new to me, so I must experiment until I get it right. I also have to work on my "elevator pitch", but I need a working story first. -ashleycoppolino

Writing with Reed (Workshop)

Ok, so remember when I said that STAC hasn't done something like this before? Well, that was about the calligraphy, but now I'm talking about mystery/crime writing.

I have dabbled in the field of writing. According to my teacher, I have this voice that is said to be sarcastic and rude, which I took as a compliment, but as I'm typing it, it seems a bit ridiculous.

Anywho, this is another unique workshop. Crime and mystery aren't exactly my go-to read or writing choice, but I think it just became a choice.

I was listening to what Reed was saying, and he said something along the lines of "there's a little bit of mystery everywhere", but not so straightforward. I actually figured it out on my own. Think about shows, movies and books that you see: is every fact given to you? NO! Mystery isn't just in Nancy Drew.

One thing that caught my attention was this exact quote from Reed, "Readers shouldn't be forced to turn the page-that's your job." One of the most honest lines from a writer. It's so true.

So, I fought the fear of writing in a new style and came up with an idea.

"The thin pin-pointed needle raced up and down so fast that the paper could barely catch up. His finger on the buttons pounded like my heart. "Can you explain your story again, Mrs. Kline?" He asked. Calmly, I answered. The needle drew a straight line."

How do you like the first few lines of my mystery novel?

It needs work, obviously, but it's just a beginning.

-ashleycoppolino

Chinese Workshop is a proper title?

The workshop today was unique. I haven't been in a workshop like this, nor do I think STAC itself has.
Honestly, as we were watching the instructor, I kept thinking that it was easy. WELL, let me tell you. NOT EASY!
She got the tones perfectly as my paper was basically drenched in water. Once I realized I was using too much water, I obviously used less. I'm used to thick paper and hard strokes. That's probably why this was so hard. I usually like the one color painting because of it's simplicity, but I did better with the color.
Honestly, I liked writing the Chinese characters more than the actual paintings. They're so strange since they're foreign to me, but so fascinating to understand. The Chinese culture is more traditional than modern America.
Fascinating. So cool.

-ashleycoppolino

Photography's Longest Exposure!

Six months. That’s right. This dream-like picture shows each phase of the sun over Bristol’s Clifton Suspension Bridge taken during half a year. The image was captured on a pin-hole camera made from an empty soda can with a 0.25mm aperture and a single sheet of photographic paper. Photographer Justin Quinnell strapped the camera to a telephone pole overlooking the Gorge, where it was left between December 19, 2007 and June 21, 2008—the Winter and Summer solstices. (That’s a 15,552,000 second exposure.) ‘Solargraph’ shows six months of the sun’s luminescent trails and its subtle change of course caused by the earth’s movement in orbit. The lowest arc being the first day of exposure on the Winter solstice, while the top curves were captured mid-Summer. (Dotted lines of light are the result of overcast days when the sun struggled to penetrate the cloud.) Quinnell, a renowned pin-hole camera artist, says the photograph took on a personal resonance after his father passed away on April 13—halfway through the exposure. He says the picture allows him to pinpoint the exact location of the sun in the sky at the moment of his father passing.

-ashleycoppolino

Workshop with Rob (and Alan)

I know what you're thinking. Alan? Yes, Alan. Alan, a.k.a., Mr. Semerdjian, needed to be photographed, so that's exactly what we did. It was an experience for us, as well as him. It was weird because we all knew who he is - a teacher in our school. It was definitely awkward, he said so himself.
Basically, we carried a huge white board (used to bounce the light), two light fixtures, a few cameras, reflectors, and more diffusers to the English Office. Yes, we set up a photoshoot jn the English Office.
We got some good shots, which is great. Rob taught us what to do in a crammed situation and how to put things together in a speedy moment.
Glad to do the job.

-ashleycoppolino

Matrix: my experience

I guess I have off the vibe that I didn't like the movie. It's not that.
There were so many concepts that were weaved into the film. The part I isn't like is rather personal. There were plenty of religious factors that were mentioned, none of which I got without research. I needed Google to help explain my religion. I feel pretty pathetic. I don't go to Church. There isn't a reason why I don't go, and is there really a reason I should?
I don't believe in fate and imaginary powers. Church is where myths are spoken, which I don't believe. I won't like and say I never wished for God's helper tried to speak to him, because I have. Bit I was raised that way.
When I get older I fear that I will lose my religion, which will push me deeper into the Matrix. I mean, I'm very far in now, which I'm not proud of, but it's just the truth.
The movie is in the Matrix itself. The part where they show the real world is created by people who are deep in the Matrix. There's no way out, that's the scary part.
I don't like realizing all of this. I was so into the Matrix that I didn't even notice it until it was brought to my attention.
That's just me ventilating on my personal Matrix experience.

-ashleycoppolino

Photos on February 15!

This workshop was interesting. We were newspaper photographers! We had tasks that needed to be completed I a certain time frame. The task included the story headline that we were shooting photos for, which is very helpful.
This assignment gave me just a quick glimpse of working as a newspaper photographer. It's not like I have a car and need to drive from location to location.. But I did have to go around the high school, which was probably more awkward than photographing people you don't know and people who expect to be photographed.
I never considered newspaper photography a task, I know photos were taken to be in the paper, but it never occurred to me how they were put together.
It's not a job for the money, but for experience.

-ashleycoppolino

photographing again!

When taking a photo, of a person, especially yourself, you check to see if you look good. Without thinking about it, the light effects how your results can be. The light can give your face a sharpness to it, or have it lit poorly, which looses the interest in the face.

Instead of manually controlling the light source, we used the light fixtures in the ceiling and the sun as our sources and used them to our benefit. We had somewhat control, but not all of it.

It was really interesting to see in the pictures that if you move one inch, your whole photograph could change.

-ashleycoppolino

Photography Workshop #2

We mainly focused on aperture, sensitivity and shutter speed.

For film cameras, these three setting are extremely important for the photograph. For digital, as many of you know, there is an automatic mode, which takes care of snapping a basic photo.

The first workshop was focused on artificial light, creating our own studio of light. The second workshop gave us the chance to go outside, which to me, seemed harder than artificial light. I've always taken my photos outside, but when you're standing there trying to adjust every setting as your model is squiggling and trying to fight their eyes from blinking, suddenly does it seem difficult. But it's worth it when you get that photo where the hair is outlined and they eyes are shined as if it was the sun itself.

Workshop #3, here I come!

-ashleycoppolino

Lighting The Room With Rob Goldman!

I won't use the word hate, but its not fair when people look at me saying that I'm "the photographer" or "the photography girl", both of which I have been named numerous times. I feel like there's a standard I need to pass, and I'm trying to pass it, but something is holding me back.

I knew a lot about what Rob was talking about. And I don't mean to sound conceded when I say that, it's just that the technical stuff is the base of photography, which I believe that I am close to overcoming.

I will not say that I am a pro photographer, not close at all, actually, but this stuff that Rob taught today is where I want to advance from. I want to master this to move on to more and more advanced photography.

Anywho, we went over things like harsh and soft light, which is major when shooting your subject. We talked about casting a shadow by placing the light source off to the side of the subject, at a 90 degree angle, the vertex being the subject, so on and so forth.

We used Elisa's camera, which was cool since I have just about the same one, so I knew how to maneuver it.

I was the "model" for the shadowing we did, which I didn't love, but I didn't entirely mind either. I don't really like being in the photo as much as I like taking them.

My favorite part about today is how we only started off with a camera. We had to find a janitor for the light bulb, we used a stool that was lying on the stage and we found a white curtain (used to diffuse the light in the photographs). We scavenged for our supplies. The best part about doing that, is that in the photograph, you don't notice it. You can't tell that we used a piece of paper as a reflector for the light.

It's like we got secrets of a photographer.. I don't know, I find it so fascinating.

-ashleycoppolino

Rob Goldman - Photographer

Rob's actually a pretty interesting guy. Aside from the fact that most artists are interesting people, Rob is definitely different.

A large part of his work is dealing with nude models, which isn't exactly what I am into, but it is definitely a type of photography that is appreciated. He captures the beauty of the human body, which people can't see when they look in the mirror.

Rob's work has been used for AT&T, Marriot Hotels, Microsoft and Nikon, just to name a few. I want to get my work out there like he did, so I for one and very exciting to do this workshop.

What I didn't know about Rob is that he is the co-founder of Art That Matters in Oyster Bay, which some of you may know is where STAC had the charcoals presented last year!

But what I love about Rob's work, is that he doesn't teach photography, let's say, but he does concentrate on the human being that concentrates on the photography.

I worked with Rob last year, and he was all in to sitting in a circle and getting a feel for the group to enhance our photography, which may sound ridiculous to you now, but wait until you're sitting in that circle.

-ashleycoppolino