It's been a while, but I'm here.

I'm not sure what state of mind I've been in lately.

I've been constantly thinking about my future.

I feel like it's in full blast.

This time next year I'll be searching for colleges. This time in two years I'll be ready to head out of Herricks. This time in three years I'll be an adult.

But I also thought about my past.

This time last year I was doing the bare minimal in school. This time two years ago I was feeling all macho since I was going into high school. This time three years ago I was into cursing and rap.

I've changed over time and I most definitely will continue to change.

It might sound strange, but I've thought a lot about my ending of life. I don't want to finish my life by thinking that 'I should have done this' or 'I should not have done that', I want to be able to look back and be satisfied with the choices I have made.

But I'm not satisfied with the choices I have made in the past, and I want that to change in the next couple of years.

Maybe it's all a self-confidence thing that I'm lacking.

Maybe it's my fear of not doing it right, so I don't do it at all.

I keep saying that I'm going to do things differently and that they're going to be better, but it never happens.

I've been confused lately. I don't know where I stand, if I even stand at all.

From always,

ashleycoppolino

here's my daily practice: www.heyitsashleyy.tumblr.com